SNAP 2007 STORY #45: MY STORY
I am a 36 year old vulnerable adult, who three years ago, was repeatedly sexually assaulted by Father X. He is still serving as a Catholic Priest in that State.
I am very thankful that I was abused by him. I know, it sounds nuts! Here are the reasons why!
I already had a good support system, in my Mom, my therapist, and a good mental health system and some very good friends (one is a staunch Catholic), though Fr. X isolated me from all of them, for nearly eight months.
I had my strong faith in God, which Fr. X could not take away from me.
Another person in my shoes might have killed themselves, when the abuse became so severe. I didn’t.
This priest obviously messed with the wrong woman, and I came out of it stronger, healthier, and more balanced.
I do want to dedicate this to my Mom, who has been there for me, when I fell into a deep depression, and when the panic attacks hit so bad, I shook and couldn’t think straight, and I became afraid of small spaces, and I gained 100 pounds, and she still told me I was beautiful.
I want to thank her for never giving up on me, when the flashbacks hit, and for listening to them, in the middle of the night, when no one else was available to hear me. She also held me when the tears came, and never stopped loving me.
Most importantly, she recognized that my utterance that I’d had “sex” (it was rape, not sex) with a Priest was an ABUSE OF POWER, because she was a school teacher and knew that if someone in her position did that with a student, she or he would lose their job and be thrown in jail.
My life has gone on. I’ve lost over 100 pounds, I’m in college now, and have many friends. I’m still Catholic, and I love my faith. The scars are still there, but I know the abuse was not my fault. I am also in counseling with the best therapist in the world!
I still have “weird priest days” when only SNAP people understand. That’s when I call Barb Dorris. I felt so isolated until I found out about SNAP! Thanks for all those great talks. Someday I want to meet you, my friend!
I pray that Jesus will forgive those who are still blaming me for being raped.
It’s not my fault that I am beautiful, intelligent, shy, or that I have problems. Many people are like me. I’m also very positive, cheerful, prayerful, and a heck of a lot more street smart!
Peace & Prayers.