"Inattentive Seductiveness" and Other Silliness
When allegedly celibate men use words and phrases about sex that you’ve never heard, that’s when you know something’s being hidden.
For example, do remember when you first heard the word ‘ephebophilia?’ Chances are it was around 2002. And chances are you heard it used by a Catholic official who was desperately trying to avoid having people think that a priest was a pedophile or a child molester.
(If you don’t know the word, don’t be embarrassed. I’m told it’s not even in the DSM 5. I’ve never heard it used by anyone but a Catholic official or Catholic therapist.)
Example two ---Springfield Illinois Bishop Thomas Paprocki used a phrase I’ve never heard before. It’s “non-sexual self-bondage.” He used it when he put a clearly sexually troubled priest, Fr. Thomas Donovan, back on the job in September 2013.
Example three --- On Friday, Minnesota Public Radio revealed new, long-secret church records involving Fr. Michael Keating of the Archdiocese of St. Paul/Minneapolis. In those records, here’ how s a high-ranking Catholic official, Fr. Kevin McDonough, called Fr. Keating’s actions: “inattentive seductiveness,” and “an ongoing pattern of irresponsible seductiveness (non-sexual)”
http://www.startribune.com/local/east/228416351.html?page=2&c=y
Huh?
If this kind of hair-splitting and word-parsing and phrase-inventing was being used to protect purse-snatchers or shop-lifters, it might be amusing. But it’s being used to protect “men of God” who are, in theory, celibate but are, in reality, sexually assaulting kids or sexually exploiting adults. So there’s nothing amusing about it. In fact, it’s disturbing because it’s one way Catholic officials deliberately minimize the horror inflicted by clerics on innocent kids and vulnerable adults and then justify keeping these dangerous clerics on the job.
Winter Appeal 2023
To our friends,
2023 has been a long year with many ups and downs for us all. As we close out the year, we at SNAP hope that you are feeling like you are on your way to being healthy, fulfilled, and happy. This past year has brought both successes and challenges. Thanks to the support you have shown in the past, we’ve been able to celebrate the good days and weather the stormy ones. Now, we are once again asking for your support as we work to support survivors new and old as we ‘Move SNAP Forward.’
At SNAP we are proud to have hosted a very well-attended conference in August 2023. This event allowed us to gather friends, survivors, advocates, and allies for a weekend of camaraderie and connection. We were so happy to be able to welcome many first-time attendees to gather in person and are already looking forward to the next conference.
To strengthen our movement for justice, healing, and prevention, SNAP will be expanding our peer support and providing more volunteer opportunities in the coming year. Through this great work, we are ensuring survivor voices are represented as we work for significant change that will benefit children and survivors.
Right now, survivors worldwide are getting the help they need from SNAP, and more and more reach out to us daily, but we need your help to keep those programs going and get our volunteers the training they need to thrive.
Your tax-deductible gift to SNAP can help offset the cost of our important mission. If you are not in a position to contribute, you can still support us by sharing this letter with those who can. As we continue to fight for survivors across the globe, your donation or sharing the great work SNAP does will help us continue our work to protect the vulnerable, heal the wounded, and prevent abuse.
Your donation ensures SNAP will be there for those who need us more than ever!
Warmly,
Michael W. McDonnell, C.P.S.
Interim Executive Director
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The “bottom line” to that conversation, McDonough wrote, was that she was certain Keating had never committed a sexual act with any underage girl before or after his ordination.
“On the other hand, she expressed a great deal of concern about a longstanding pattern of behavior that she knows to have influenced several women, including herself,” McDonough wrote.
“I proposed to her the phrase ‘inattentive seductiveness’ and she said that she thought that was very accurate,” he wrote…."
Okay, you make the call…….which of the two is more professional and ethical?………Archdiocesan “investigative skills” or their “child protection skills”? Forget both items, where the hell is the LOGIC?
In Philadelphia, our leadership uses the phrase “boundary violations” in place of your “inattentive seductiveness”. The rest of the US Catholic faithful understand such conduct as “sexual abuse”.
“However, we also have obligations as Christians and citizens of our communities. When it becomes a question of breaking the law or putting children at risk, I believe the need to maintain the distinction is superseded by a more powerful obligation,” she said. Fr. Kevin McDonough, a former vicar general who served as delegate for safe environment McDonough wrote, Wehmeyer was “not all that interested in an actual sexual encounter, but rather was obtaining some stimulation by ‘playing with fire.’ This sort of behavior would not show up in the workplace.”
Two points of view regarding “risk” of sexual abuse to children and young adults. Whose understanding and perspective are the parishioners of the Archdiocese of Minneapolis-St. Paul more comfortable with and trust in?
Michael Skiendzielewski
Captain (retired)
Philadelphia Police Dept.